Sanctuary for the Abused

Thursday, April 19, 2018

Loved? No: Dishonored and Abused

Loved? Dishonored, and Abused

Hey Honey, "express yourself"...
("wife" in this article can also mean "significant other"... such as girlfriend, etc.)

- be sure to tell your wife that the only reason she married you was so she could sit around the house all day and do nothing, even though she was fifteen weeks pregnant at the time and in a high risk category due to a previous miscarriage and on doctor's orders to REST REST REST

- also tell her that the only reason she wrote for the newspaper was so she could provoke, because you were jealous of the fact that she could write what the people want to hear, and you couldn't

- act like you can never have anything by throwing everything you own in the garbage, or out the bedroom window. (I remember looking out our window one day to see stuffed toys that had been torn apart, laying on the lawn for the superintendent of the building to clean up; at first I didn't realize what the mess was until I took a good look, then I was completely stunned... even more-so when I realized they were the stuffed mementos that belonged to my husband!)

- You could even fake walking in your sleep in order to scare your wife -- pretending to attempt climbing out your bedroom window (I should have let him; we were on the third floor).

- leave the room that you're in, acting perfectly normal, then go into the bathroom and pound your fist into your hand when you're in the bathroom alone talking to yourself

- when pounding your fist into your hand be sure to whisper loudly "bam, bam, bam"

- when you're done doing this come out of the bathroom and return to the room you were in; when your wife asks you if all is okay look at her dumbfounded & answer "yes, why wouldn't it be?"

- you could take a butcher knife to your work shirts and shred them, then throw them into the closet so that when your wife is cleaning she will find them and "feel guilty because she must have upset poor little you."

- or you could just tear your shirts apart with your bare hands

- take out your anger by banging your head and your feet onto your vehicle (this was witnessed on more than one occasion by a neighbor)

- when your wife wishes to discuss something respond with yelling and screaming

- don't forget to drool like a wild animal while you're yelling and screaming, a documented trait of an abuser

-add the touch of pounding and kicking the furniture while you respond to discussion (more often than not I was sitting on this furniture)

- if perhaps you might want to respond in a reasonable tone, do so with these words: "I don't know", "I don't remember", or "I don't want to talk about it"

- after you have repeated the above words like they're the only ones in your vocabulary, sit on the sofa with your arms at your side, your shoulders slouched, your chin hanging, your eyes glazed over, and your tongue hanging slightly out of your mouth so that you appear as an "idiot" as defined in the dictionary; this intimidation is used to 'scare' your wife into thinking she's 'really done it this time' therefore she'll back off and leave poor little you alone

- when you're screwing around on your wife (or significant other) be sure to look her straight in the eye and tell her you love her and tell all your friends & family you love her too. Repeatedly.

- when your wife catches you in one of your numerous lies be sure to go ballistic and blame her

- you could also choke her and throw her to the floor by her neck, and just to make sure she learned her lesson you could also go for her throat again a few days later

- and always, always remember, that everything that goes wrong in your life is your wife's fault.

There's even more:

- your ex-wife tells your present wife that you used to start fires in the basement to keep warm after a night of drinking, with her & the baby asleep upstairs... oh, and your ex-wife knew the dents in your car were from your head and your feet

-you stay up half the night on internet porn sites then blame your step-child's boyfriend for the access charges or download history (meanwhile he hadn't even been to our residence at these times, or on our computer at all for that matter).

- the floor under where you were sitting at the computer half the night is all gooey in the morning (I am not first I thought it was 'cat barf' but upon further inspection I came to the realization of exactly what it was. A couple of nights I walked out into the living room when he was on the computer to the wee hours of the morning; as soon as he saw me he immediately shut the computer off).

- even after it was proven that you were the only one accessing the porn sites on the net, up half the night doing who knows what to yourself, you still persist in yelling & screaming at the top of your lungs at your wife, that it wasn't you; your own ex-wife will tell the current wife that is your response when you've been caught red-handed (in this case 'one-handed') at something.

Oh, here's the best one of all:

- drink out of a glass that is obviously sitting & soaking at the back of the counter away from everything else and realize the glass has Javex in it, freak out & accuse your wife of trying to poison you, meanwhile the cupboard is full of clean glasses and you always, always get cold water from the filter jug in the fridge; just another thing to "blame your wife for"

- bang holes in the wall with an obvious object then claim to know nothing about it

- take all your friends phone numbers out of the memory system on the phone while in one of your 'feel sorry for me' moods then yell & scream at your wife that you can't have any friends (the only reason my hubby did this was because I liked his 'outside of work' friends & enjoyed visiting them; but with my hubby, I was supposed to bitch & complain about them, not have a good word to say about them, and not want him to associate with them; now you know where I'm coming from with 'mind games & twisted facts'; if you think you're confused just imagine living with this psychopath)

- tell your wife that she is insignificant, her existence is meaningless, and she is a burden, just like you told her your first wife was

- when the curtains that your wife bought from a friend who smokes interfere with her breathing, as she has asthma, and your wife has to sleep in another room, be sure to go apesh*t & accuse her of being pissed off at you because you were on the computer half the night, put your boots on & proceed to leave the house over 'her issues.'

- be sure to obliterate your wife in everyone else's eyes, especially when your own mother tells you that your temper will ruin your life & your wife comes out looking better than you do; you must destroy her image in everyone's eyes because you're afraid of the truth coming out

- you must convince everyone else that your wife is a psycho.


(NOTE: Women can be just as abusive and crazy-making as men.)

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shared by Barbara at 12:19 AM



I hate to post this here but I don't know where else to put it. I read your blog and Kathy's blog weekly. I went on today and noticed that Kathy's blog is disabled. I read about her passing on your site and that is a great loss. I was wondering if her site is going to end or is her family going to keep it open. If it goes away that would be another great loss.

2:19 PM  

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