Sanctuary for the Abused
Monday, May 16, 2016
Sexual Relationships with Narcissists
Intimacy does not exist. You will frequently feel used.
Your own sexual preferences will be boycotted or twisted. Narcissists have a strong tendency to sexually abuse a partner. Here is a list of some of these abusive behaviors (yours may use just a couple of these or ones that are not listed here! don't fool yourself):
- You are prohibited from masturbating or feel good about your own body under the threat of punishment
- If you do masturbate, they will ask to watch; couching it as 'learning to please you'
- You are being encouraged to watch porn although you don't usually
- Your sexual gratification is only to reassure the narcissist they are a good lover
- The narcissist pretends to be sexual for you but is after her/his gratification only
- Your sexual past is being torn apart or thrown in your face during or after the relationship
- The narcissist revels in telling you, in detail, all about their sexual past and that you will never measure up to their other lovers
- You are being told that all you want is sex (although you know this is not the case, however sex is central to the narcissist)
- The narcissist may freeze you out of sex altogether while calling you a nymphomanic
- The narcissist instigates sex (like telling you erotic things and sending you pictures or emails which are sexual) but then decides last minute that nothing is to take place or they have changed their minds
- You are feeling humiliated and yet the narcissist claims that (s)he has been humiliated
- The narcissist could care less when you get hurt physically and/or emotionally and enjoys it when you get hurt. It proves they are having an effect on you
- The narcissist instigates and turns everything into a sexual GAME
- The narcissist tells you to have sexual relations with others (encourage you to be unfaithful or have sex with others in front of him), although the narcissist has a strong tendency to flirt with others and to be unfaithful
- The narcissist makes fun of your sexuality or body in front of others (e.g. you have a small penis or small breasts or skinny or fat - objectification of sex)
- The narcissist has to try out everything possible (positions, toys, etc)
- The narcissist is an exhibitionist and will want sex in public and/or dresses inappropriately at home and or elsewhere (tight clothes without a bra or jock strap) and says it was an accident
- The narcissist will send you pictures of their penis or breasts wanting to know your rating and thoughts about it. They will want your pictures to do the same to.